Car Accident

     On Tuesday, at 4:45 PM, Roger Clementine had a head on collision with John Jacob Jingleheimer-Smith and his wife Melba at 1st and Slaughter lane.
     Clementine was an underage driver as well as unlicensed, speeding, and driving on the wrong side of the road. The police cited him for all of the above.
     "The boy should not have been driving at all, let alone out on such a busy street," police officer Billy Joel said.
     At the time of the collision Clementine was driving a 1948 Studebaker at 60 mph and JJJS was driving a 1989 Yugo Firebelcher at 10 mph.
      "Driving isn't all that hard, it was that ol' shmuck who was going way to slow, that's why he hit me," underage driver Roger Clementine said.
      John and Melba JJJS were admitted to the hospital and Melba has been released since. John with a serious head injury and Melba with a bloody nose.
     "Mr. Smith is in bad shape, he received a serious concussion which at his age is incredibly bad. I don't see him making it through the night," brain surgeon Yu Wong Lee said.
     The weather that day was clear and sunny and the road was not slick.
     "This is what the government is doing wrong, they can't keep the cheerun in school, so they run amuck causin ruckus," passenger Melba JJJS said.